In his effort to substantiate his belief that human multiplicity is insignificant and that conflicts are not inevitable, Bertrand Russell sets up his first argument regarding unhappiness on the basis of 'things that it is easy to show make people unhappy' and tries to explore 'first, what happiness is, and secondly, what are the things that produce it.' The basis of this is to ascertain whether something, the lack of which makes people uncomfortable, is the basis of something of great value. On the second question, he uses for guidance the casual observations of all time, and hence his answers may be taken as facts. After having argued that all talk about absolute values is without meaning, he supports this argument by elaborating, 'just as it is the lack of whatever makes the sun useful to us that gives us ennui as we look out on the rain, this is what leads to my belief that all pleasure is derived from repair, happiness from satisfying desires.' We are happy when we 'have everything that we want and no irritating desires to intrude.' This urge to repair comes instinctively.
Knowing then the instinct for avoiding injury which makes us unhappy, he goes ahead to draw the following 'significant' conclusions. First, that as most people are born incurious and stay so, anxious only to preserve what they have, nearly all derive their only pleasure from being busy. Consequently, 'happiness is commonest among the middling sort of people who are always occupied.' Secondly, that if any men should be particularly happy, then these are the comfortable classes. 'If any improvement in human life is wanted, it must not be merely more satisfaction of desires of any kind, but desires of a hungry kind. The amount of production of nuts in a year matters more to squirrel happiness than the amount of nuts his table will bear.' At the bottom of this hero's argument is that by removing great discomfort, discontent is avoided, and he believes that it would be important to choose if it were possible between so ordered a freedom from war and tragedy and so much else or sweet play, that the occasion of delight should seem reasonable.
Materialism and Consumerism
A modern malaise—though ancient as well—functions in the form of extreme materialism or consumerism. This appears in beliefs, through popular media emphasizing material goods so that their acquisition and possession seem tied, often illogically, to happiness. In an advertising age that manipulates moods for the benefit of corporations rather than individuals, the mechanical anonymous carburetor strikes deeply into thought and emotion. There is thus a corrupt reversion to an old name for a new quasi-cult; but vital differences such as the satisfaction of urges that satisfy no crucial personal needs or the profound dependence upon advertisement are ignored. Violation of moderation due to wealth is a third reason why extreme materialism develops, and it is compared to ancient hubris contrasting with ancient moderation since in neither case does extreme riches guarantee happiness. Instead, exemplary poverty or modesty is suggested. The coherence and interdependence of these beliefs as conditions for truth and happiness and moral and psychological health are emphasized, as integratively synthesized these areas showing how inhumanity breeds unhappiness.
Combined with these beliefs are the religious ones that it is impossible to serve wealth and God: the enjoyed passion of the object. These two often conflicting sets of values indicate that there should be a special concern for promoting content within the middle classes in a humane yet moderate fashion, as luxury is not permitted, yet extreme wealth is ill-regarded—a problem to which this belief relates. This problem is far more severe in an age of advertising and popular media, yet it has deeper roots in possessiveness that attacks any value in itself, replacing it with one that had been previously only associated with the purpose or possession of consumer goods.
Social Comparison and Envy
A rough way to make the points listed in the preceding section is to think of jealousy and envy as social comparisons. When one "wants" something, there is a comparison of themselves to that something, whether they are aware of the comparison or not. We should be clear here to distinguish between the act of comparison and the accompanying affect. Envy is an emotion that can be attached to a type of social comparison. For instance, a "two-stage approach to social comparison" involves individuals first making social comparisons of existing conditions to a desired condition and then judging their well-being relative to that of others. This concept is based on the principle that individuals do not necessarily expect their well-being to be diminished by only making comparisons between their own history and the present condition of others, but only by making comparisons between the present condition of others and the potential future selves desiring specific attributes or traits.
It is our conclusion that envy is produced by social comparison, often unintentionally or automatically. Moreover, envy arises mainly when the comparison involves a skill or talent in which the individual has some perceived relative advantage. This is certainly consistent with a rivalry-based explanation of envy. Social comparison provides a means for envy to act as a motivational device, where exposure to others' good fortune can produce unhappy feelings only when those others live in close proximity. Other people, rather than an abstract criterion of 'sufficient income,' might form necessary points of comparison for such competition.
Cultivating Gratitude and Mindfulness
By focusing on only the negative aspects of life, we lose our attention to other pleasurable things that are happening all around us. To restore this balance, it is important to cultivate a sense of gratitude. One way of doing so is to keep a gratitude journal or list, in which you write about three to five things for which you are grateful every day. Such simple exercises have been shown to increase well-being over time, partially by forcing us to notice different things to be grateful for every day.
Another important way to increase our well-being is to develop mindfulness. Mindfulness can be seen as an enhanced, present-focused attention to and awareness of things that are happening all around us, in our own minds, or in relation to our bodies and the environment. Achieving mindfulness can be both relatively simple and extremely difficult, depending on how much attention you normally pay to your surroundings and experiences.
What makes me happy
Making me happy is the ultimate goal that most people try to achieve, almost all the time. I believe I am not an exception to this common aim. However, happiness is a tough and sticky concept because it is rather difficult to define. In general terms, when I say I am happy, this means that I have in my hands almost everything I could desire. I have roughly summarized that happiness for most people involves acquiring things we want or like. Relevant factors include how much money I earn, the quality of my relationships with my family and friends, self-esteem and personal security, competence in my social and professional life, and in general, the possibilities I have to take initiative and control over how I spend my waking hours.
However, if I start thinking about happiness in much more specific detail, I can easily identify many additional things that are important for my well-being. A good sense of the importance of getting and keeping the things I like has been reported from various kinds of empirical research. For example, I have no problem accepting the solid, generally agreed empirical evidence that shows a positive correlation between income and happiness. Of course, this is not what psychologists mean by happiness – the psychology of happiness is about how those feelings of life satisfaction come about. It deals with things you like, such as pleasure, meaningfulness, or enjoyment, and as the opposite of things you dislike, such as distress and unhappiness.
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